My poor attempt to capture Bret Hart and Yokozuna staring at each other while with the Caesars Palace buildings behind them. It is a cool image.
So, WrestleMania 9 is the first outdoor Mania of it's kind. The host is Gorilla Monsoon, who is dressed in a toga and says "I can get used to this." C' mon, Gorilla, you hate being in a toga. He introduces the newest member of the broadcast team, Jim Ross. "GOOD OL, JR!" Jim says the same thing about being in a toga. C'mon, JR, you miss your cowboy hat and suit. Don't worry, J.R., you will be a legend.
So, Funkis Maximus....or Howard Finkel announces Caesar and Cleopatra to welcome everyone to WrestleMania 9.
Jim Ross is announcing, and the Macho Man comes out with everyone catering to him. Bobby Heenan comes out, and he is backwards on a camel, looking like a goof.
TATANKA VS. SHAWN MICHAELS- INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE
Michaels comes to the ring with a mysterious woman. Ross and Macho are perplexed at who she is. Heenan jumps in and says that she is Luna Vachon. Her father was the Butcher and her uncle was "Mad Dog" Vachon. Five minutes ago, they made a fool out of Bobby Heenan and he had to throw some wrestling knowledge at everyone's faces. The match was a good setup for the event. Michaels and Tatanka were rising stars at this point and this contest was a platform for them to shine. Sensational Sherri enters ringside to be in Tatanka's corner. The ending saw Michaels attempt an axe handle off the apron, but misses and hits the ring steps. Shawn pulls the referee out and the bell rings. It is a count-out? Didn't Michaels pull the referee out? It should be a disqualification. Tatanka wins the match, but not the title. After the match, Luna attacks Sherri as Tatanka comes to her aid. Good match to start off the show.
STEINERS VS. HEADSHRINKERS
Another solid contest between two great tag teams during that era. One spot saw Scott Steiner fly completely over the top rope. J.R. kept calling a clothesline "Steinerline." Bron Brekker's dad and uncle get the victory with a beautifully executed Frankensteiner by Scott.
Mean Gene interviews Doink the Clown. Now, WWE deserves blame for creating this guy, because now you have trash bag wrestlers imitating this character around the country while having matches at a Wal-Mart parking lot. Doink says that Crush will be seeing double vision.
DOINK VS. CRUSH
I really don't know what make of this bout. It started out as a squash match with Crush dominating throughout the contest. Is it me or does Bryan Adams (Crush) look legit pissed off for being in a match with Doink the Clown?When Doink was on offense, he executed a nice looking Piledriver. While outside, Doink tries to go under the ring, but is stopped. With the referee out, Crush applies his head vice, when a second Doink appears and hits Crush in the head with a prosthetic arm. Heenan says that it is an illusion. Doink gets the victory as the referees try to look for the second Doink under the ring.
Todd Pettingill is in the crowd, interviewing Japanese photographers about WrestleMania and Yokozuna. He says that he is drenched with beer and soda, but is having fun. As much as people thought he was corny, Todd Pettingill was trying to bring a positive spin on what would become a dark era for WW(F). Kudos to him.
BOB BACKLUND VS. RAZOR RAMON
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......Uh, uh, I'm up. This looks like a classic case of creative not knowing what to do with these two, so let's put them in a match. Ramon didn't even win with the Razor's Edge.
Mean Gene interviews Money Inc. During the interview, they show the clip of IRS hitting Brutus Beefcake with a briefcase in his face. If you read or heard the horror stories of Ed Leslie's accident that caused him to get Titanium plates to keep his face intact, you wonder how this man is still alive. Damn, DiBiase was a natural in the wrestling business. This promo proved it. Mike Rotunda (IRS) mentions that Hogan had an accident coming out of the gym, implying that they had something to do with it.
MONEY INC. VS. HOGAN/BEEFCAKE
Beefcake and Hogan come out, and Hulk has an awful-looking black eye. Before I started to do this, I had to look around to see what caused Hogan's black eye. I found two accounts. One, Hogan claimed that he had a water-skiing accident while in Vegas. The other was by Jim Cornette. He claims that Hulk suffered the black eye, because Randy Savage punched him due to Elizabeth staying at the Hogan's residence. I would lean towards Cornette's story, considering Macho was overprotective of Elizabeth and Hogan tends stretch the truth. Right away, I knew that the Hogan/Beefcake team wasn't going to win the titles. This was the buddies to the end, Terry Bollea and Ed Leslie, just hamming it up for the Vegas crowd. It was around this time where I was distracted by the power lines in the distance. Money Inc. walked out, until Howard Finkel announced that if they didn't get back to the ring before the count of ten, they will lose their titles. They get back at eight. Seriously, those are a lot of power lines up there. DiBiase is successful taking off Beefcake's mask and they punish him in the face. Earl Hebner is out and Hogan uses Beefcake's mask to hit DiBiase and IRS for the pin. Jimmy Hart turns his jacket inside out and it shows referee stripes. Hart counts to three and hands the belts to Hogan and Beefcake. Another referee comes out and awards the bout to Money Inc. via disqualification. Hogan and Beefcake are acting like fools and open up the briefcase. They find money and pass it out to the Caesars Palace crowd. The match wasn't bad, but it wasn't good either.
Pettingill interviews the late Natalie Cole and the CEO for Caesars Palace.
So, Hogan came back and he can enjoy the rest of the night in the back watching the show, right?............RIGHT????????
Mean Gene interviews Mr. Perfect and they mention Lex Luger knocking out Bret Hart with his forearm at the WrestleMania brunch. Damn, creative is already bailing on this storyline. Speaking of wrestlers with Titanium plates inserted in their bodies, Luger has one in his forearm.
LEX LUGER VS. MR. PERFECT
Judging by this match, I can see why creative had this as a one-off. Luger came out with bikini-clad women. This got the biggest roar for this match. Bobby Heenan was fawning over Lex Luger and mispronouncing Narcissist for this? The contest was bland and the crowd was silent for this. Curt Hennig and Lex Luger deserved better than this. Lex wins the bout by a blown call by the official, when he missed seeing Perfect's feet on the ropes. Luger hits Perfect with his Titanium-built forearm afterwards. Perfect comes to and attacks Luger backstage, but Michaels comes from behind and punishes Perfect. This should be an interesting program.
Here's a cool memory I wanted to share. The night after WrestleMania, some family members and I went to the Wrestling Challenge taping at the then known as America West Arena and saw an Intercontinental Championship match between Mr. Perfect and Shawn Michaels. Curt Hennig won the bout and the Intercontinental Championship, or so we thought. Later on in the night, the decision was reversed and Perfect didn't win the belt, but he was victorious in the contest via DQ. this also happened on the same night as the classic National Championship game between Michigan and North Carolina where the infamous timeout happened. Nice stuff.
Savage and Heenan get into a heated argument at ringside. Is Savage going to give the Brain a black eye? Gorilla talks about the last two matches on the card.
UNDERTAKER VS. GIANT GONZALEZ
During retirement, Mark Calaway has been discussing his career with WWE, and has been enjoying his time that he is no longer in the ring frequently. He talks about this match with Giant Gonzalez with disdain. I can see why. I thought Giant Gonzalez was cool, because last name. Undertaker comes out with vultures on each side of him. This was probably the moment when the company realized that they shouldn't put stiff wrestlers to face the Undertaker and have him go up against mobile competitors. That seemed to pay off. Giant Gonzalez is AWFUL. He couldn't sell or execute a move properly. Also, I'm not demeaning the man now that he is deceased, but I'm watching this and he wasn't good. He was 7 foot 6 and that was enough to get a slot at WrestleMania. Look at Omos today. Wippleman jumps on the apron and tosses a cloth into the ring. Gonzalez smothers the cloth onto the Undertaker's face. According to the announcers, there was a smell of chloroform. Honestly, I wish Giant Gonzalez would smother me with a cloth doused with chloroform, so I would not have to see this match again. Undertaker wins by DQ, but is down motionless on the mat. A gurney is brought to take Taker out. Gonzalez chokeslams the referee for whatever reason. Undertaker comes back and is after the giant. He is able to take the giant off his feet. This was the worst match of the night, hands down. Poor Undertaker.
Mean Gene makes a joke about Heenan needing an underwear salesman. This happened two hours ago, and they are still thinking this is funny. They show clips of Yokozuna's path of destruction leading up to WrestleMania. Gene brings in Hulk Hogan for his thoughts on the main event........Wait, what is Hogan doing there? NO, NO....Hulk should be in the back, partying it up. Hogan tells everyone that he came out of Bret's dressing room. Probably told him thanks for carrying the load while he was on "vacation." He says that Bret will win and the belt will stay in the USA. Yokozuna will be a national hero in his homeland and that foreign country called......San Francisco, California, according to Wikipedia. Hogan ends the interview by posing for the camera.
Hogan is going to be involved in the main event, isn't he?
Pettingill is interviewing more people. Did he just shove a child away to interview two guys dressed in togas?
WW(F) CHAMPIONSHIP
BRET "HITMAN" HART VS. YOKOZUNA
Okay, I'll cool it with the smartass remarks about Yokozuna not being from Japan. I'll play along in this little game. The camera shot of Bret coming out was pretty cool. Here's the assessment of this contest. I think both men gave it their best to put on a capable main event. Considering that Yokozuna is way larger than Hart, he tried to make this work. Bret is able to get the Sharpshooter on Yoko while he was facedown. Fuji throws salt in Bret's eyes and blinds him. Yokozuna pins Hart and becomes the WW(F) champion. (Side note: He became the first Samoan-American to win the world title at WrestleMania.)
Hogan comes out. I KNEW IT! Hulk helps Bret to back. Fuji gets on the mic and issues a challenge to him. Fuji then says that they will put the title on the line if Hogan accepts. Bret tells Hogan to go for it.
Yoko attacks Hogan and holds him, so Mr. Fuji can throw salt. Hulk ducks and the salt hits Yokozuna's eyes. Hulk hits a clothesline and Yoko goes down. Hogan hits the legdrop and gets a three count as the crowd erupts. Hulk Hogan wins the WW(F) Championship as the show closes.
(!@#$%^&*()!@#$%^&*()!!@#$%&) or (BLEEP!)
Let me get this straight, Bret Hart had the championship for months. He put his heart and soul into his matches as the champion. He seemed as if he was on board with dropping the title to Yokozuna, then Hogan comes in to get the spotlight. Yokozuna didn't have the title long enough to have Howard Finkel announce him as the new champion. He would win the championship a few months later at the King Of The Ring PPV as Hogan left for WCW. Bret and Yoko would have a rematch at the next year's WrestleMania.
The ninth edition of the biggest event in wrestling was a dud. It was just bad. The first two matches were great and should have set the tone for the rest of the show. It didn't. The Undertaker/Great Gonzalez was a stinker, and not because of the chloroform. The main event should have been better and could have good without Hogan taking the championship. And those togas they were wearing. Having a themed WrestleMania seems overrated, am I right?
Oh, well.
(For more content, check out our Facebook page, our website @www.realsportsaz.com and the Wix mobile app)
Comments