(Photo by SI)
The 58th version of the NFL's biggest game to award a team the Lombardi Trophy was a happening event. It was so happening that it is the most watched program in television history. Not only that, but I was also able to catch the game on three different channels: CBS, Univision and Nickelodeon. That gave me three different points of view about the game. Also, I decided to do a different format this season and take notes through each quarter. Hopefully, it's an insightful report.
FIRST QUARTER
-Post Malone sings a great rendition of America the Beautiful. During the performance, Taylor Swift and Blake Lively are laughing it up.
-Reba McIntire has an awesome performance of the National Anthem. This isn't her first rodeo in that department. She also performed the Anthem 32 years ago at WrestleMania 8 in Indianapolis.
-During the Coin Toss, the NFL honors the heroes of the devastating fires in Maui last year. Marcus Mariotta narrated the video package.
-CBS decided to produce a new score graphic. I can actually read this one clearly.
-Apparently, Ariana Grande is playing Dorothy in a reboot of the Wizard of Oz. The movie industry is like a plastic bottle, because it keeps recycling. Never mind.
-Apparently, they are rebooting Planet of the Apes. Why are you rebooting something when the last reboot wasn't that good.
-Hollywood is rebooting the movie Twister. What the @#$%^!? Okay, I can't stands no more. You mean to tell me that Hollywood is that uninspired and lazy that they are willing to recycle a 90's cult classic? (Side note: I think it's a cult classic, so stop your laughter.) The late Bill Paxton is rolling in his grave after this news.
-Gronk misses the Kick of Destiny for the second straight year. Apparently, this was scripted. When you have John Cena in the ad, then it is definitely scripted.
-If there was one football highlight during this scoreless first quarter, Chase Young was able to get a sack after being called out by his coaches. That'll show them.
-The CBS broadcast mentions the new class for the Football Hall of Fame. You know you're old if you watched most of these guys get drafted and finish their careers up. Cheers to them on their way to Canton. On a serious note, prayers go to new inductee Steve "Mango" McMichael as he battles ALS.
-It was here when the Nickelodeon and Univision feed was five seconds ahead of the CBS one.
A scoreless first quarter here in Super Bowl LVIII.
SECOND QUARTER
-Jake Moody breaks the scoreless tie with a Super Bowl record field goal of 55 yards.
-Mecole Hardman makes a nice 53-yard catch. I legit forgot that played for the Chiefs again. Also, this is foreshadowing for later.
-Fanduel paid tribute to Carl Weathers, who died a few days earlier. RIP to the man who brought Apollo Creed to life and was a mainstay in action movies and television. He probably a stew going up in heaven. This was a reference to the show Arrested Development. I will make a couple more references during this piece.
-Dre Greenlaw suffers an injury while going back on to the field. It is later revealed to be an Achilles injury. That sucks, I hope for a speedy recovery. This reminded me of Navarro Bowman's horrific injury against the Seahawks.
-Tony Romo called Nick Bosa "Joey" during one play. That was hilarious.
-Looking at the Nickelodeon broadcast, Ian Eagle and Nate Burleson are on the call. Listen up football world, Ian Eagle is one of the most underrated play-by-play announcers in sports. He deserves more credit.
-The Chiefs are not doing themselves any favors by committing bad penalties. Shades of a few years ago against Tampa Bay.
-The Niners execute a nice touchdown with the flanker, Juwan Jennings, throwing the pass to Christian McCaffrey. Jim Nantz mentions that Jennings was a quarterback in high school.
-The cameras show Travis Kelce yelling and grabbing his coach, Andy Reid. He really wants to have a big game for his ladylove.
Halftime: San Francisco is leading 10-3. It has been a defensive chess match between the two Steves.
HALFTIME SHOW
-Usher is up. I'm thinking should Nickelodeon show this. It was tame, no worries.
-Mr. Raymond gives Alicia Keys a passionate hug. It instantly becomes a meme.
-Lil' Jon and Ludacris join in on the halftime show. If you are into 2000 nostalgia, then this is your wheelhouse.
-I like the Univision panel during halftime.
-On the CBS side, Boomer Esiason becomes Mr. Obvious and says that the Chiefs are looking frustrated.
THIRD QUARTER
-Kansas City gets the ball and their first drive is a disaster. Fumble (which they recovered), a short pass and an interception.
-Great punt coverage from the Niners after a three-and-out.
-Beyonce and Tony Hale are in a commercial. She says that she has a country album coming out. She is from Texas, so it makes sense. Also, Tony Hale was Buster Bluth in the show Arrested Development. There is your second reference from that show.
-Jelly Roll is in a commercial. He is the new Snoop Dogg where he can telepath everywhere.
-The Chiefs have 5 penalties, 4 fumbles and one interception at 11:36 in the third quarter. According to Brobible, they recovered 6 of the 7 fumbles in the game.
-Taylor is still dancing and having a ball, despite her beau having a frustrating game.
-Mr. T is in a commercial. Corporate hounds who want to spend that green on ads, put Mr. T in something every year. Will Ferrell wasn't in a commercial this year that I know of.
-CBS showed the celebrities in the crowd. Leo C was trying to be incognito and looking at his phone. Lady Gaga seemed like she would rather be elsewhere than there. The game doesn't have that much scoring, I get it.
-Deebo goes out with an injury, but he comes back. Rest easy, Niners fans.
-Hollywood's "It" girl, Jenna Ortega is in a Doritos commercial. By my count, that is the first commercial from Doritos at this point. Good, save that money and produce more taco flavored chips.
-Travis still looks like a Pouty McPouterson, despite making a big first down catch.
-It is now four times that Taylor Swift has been shown. If you are doing a drinking game, put some food and water in your system.
-Jim Nantz says there is a streaker on the field.
-Harrison Butker rebreaks the Super Bowl record for longest field goal at 57 yards. That's a trivia question going forward.
-Five times now, get some sleep after the game if you have to. Also, I'm doing this countdown as what Jeremy Irons said in the movie Die Hard with a Vengeance, "It's a poor attempt at humor."
-Ray-Ray McCloud has a brainfart and tried to grab the ball while on the ground during a punt. The Chiefs recover.
-What do good teams do? They capitalize on the miscue. Mahomes finds MVS for the touchdown. KC is up 13-10.
-Six times now, time to drink soda.
FOURTH QUARTER
-The guy who created "Tight End Day" has his first catch of the game.
-"The Game Manager" Brock Purdy produced a touchdown drive where Juwan Jennings fought his way to the end zone. The extra point is blocked, though.
-On Univision, Michael Cera is in an ad for CeraVe. He was George Michael Bluth in the Arrested Development. That's three. Will Arnett is the voice of Reese's and they aired an ad. He was GOB Bluth on that show. That is a bonus.
-On Nickelodeon, Spongebob and Patrick are doing commentary. They could bring Doug, Tommy Pickles or the cast of You Can't Do That On Television for some insight on the game. Remember your roots, Nickelodeon.
-Tracker is on after the Super Bowl. What the !@#$% is that?
-I thought that Brock Purdy was going into Joe Montana mode.
-Taylor looks miffed. By the way, that is #8.
-T-Mobile had an ad which sang, "What A Feeling" and featured Jennifer Beals. Another commercial did this earlier and paid homage to Flashdance. RIP Irene Cara.
-Jake Moody, with ice in his veins, hits a 53-yard field goal to put San Fran in the lead with 1:53 left.
-"Game Manager" Mahomes executes a drive where Kelce is starting to perk himself up as Butker kicks a field goal with :03 left as we head to the second overtime in Super Bowl history. We all remember the first one.
OVERTIME
-Jim Nantz informs the audience that there are new overtime rules, stating that both teams have a chance to score. The Niners decide to receive first, which is gutsy.
-Chris Jones is moving his hands around non-stop until he is set in his position.
-George Kittle is headed to the locker room but comes back.
-Joe Cool is watching but doesn't look cool.
-Kyle Shanahan is finally using the run to set up the pass. Unfortunately, they have to settle for a field goal. They are up 22-19.
-#10 for Ms. Swift. Somewhere in his suite, Roger is calculating the figures that Ms. Swift's appearance can generate.
-Also, ESPN showed her chugging a beer down like a champ.
-Mahomes runs for a first down, as Taylor makes it a baker's dozen, by my count.
-Patrick executed a great drive and went for the jugular with time winding down to find Mecole Hardman for the game-winning touchdown and a future episode for Secret Base, which they will say, "Welcome to a moment in history."
Another great game in which both teams wanted to scratch and claw their way to win. The Chiefs become the first team since the Patriots in the 2000's to go back-to-back. It could be the greatest Super Bowl of all-time, due to the finish. Mecole Hardman had three catches in the game, two were critical for the Chiefs in their victory. Jim Nantz interviews Hardman for five seconds and tells him to celebrate. Kelce starts singing as Taylor looks mortified.
I didn't like Kelce's explanation of yelling and grabbing Andy Reid. He laughed it off during the postgame presser. Think of it this way, the game was aired on Nickelodeon and children are watching with their parents. They see Travis do that and think that it's okay. A simple apology at the presser could have diffused the situation.
As much as everyone is annoyed by it, Taylor Swift is a way to generate interest from the league. The NFL is trying it's best to tap to different markets. The game was broadcasted on Nickelodeon, to target the younger audiences, and Univision to go after the Latino market. They go across the pond every season for numerous games to appease the European fans. At the end of the day, the NFL is a business and when they see that Taylor Swift generated around $350 million for the league, they have to strike when the iron is hot. It sucks, but that's reality.
I wanted to end this on a positive note, unfortunately, there was a tragedy during the Chiefs' celebration. 21 hurt and one killed in a shooting to honor the team.
Some people still will not learn.
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